"Die Before Dying"

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Hare Krishna,

Just as there is life, there is death. Someone or something takes birth, grows,stays for some time, deteriorates, and then dies. Another name for birth isdeath. You cannot have one without the other, meaning that when someone isborn, someone will soon die (as most species do not live very long); and whensomeone dies, someone is soon born. Everyone and everything in its normal statewants to live as long as possible—eternally. Eternality, however, is notassociated with matter, but is a spiritual affair. Death to matter and to ourmaterial bodies is inevitable, but if we master the science of dying beforedying, we will connect with that which is eternal—our soul and its home in thespiritual world. After all, death is to remove everything false and secondary.
My mother, who is deceased, often used to say, “Give me my flowers while I canstill see them.” As I child, I thought of it as strange, but as an adult, Ithought of it as a sign of wisdom. My mother understood the body to betransient and she celebrated life—“the now,” realizing one must show their loveand affection for life at every moment. Our life or the lives of others will betaken away in the near future. If one lives with proper preparation anddetachment, one will master the science of dying before dying so as to connectwith the soul and its home—the spiritual world. After all, death is to removeeverything false and secondary.
When we die before dying, we put first things first. The activities thatnourish our souls and help us detach from the illusion and confusion ofmaterial culture are our priorities. Since we know that life is meant toprepare for a glorious death, we can live each day as if it is our last.Therefore, there is no time to waste on irrelevant, superfluous activities.Even when we must give time to somewhat superficial things, it must be done ina way that enhances or strengthens the primary, significant involvements. Ifone lives with proper preparation and detachment, one will master the scienceof dying before dying so as to connect with the soul and its home—the spiritualworld. After all, death is to remove everything false and secondary.
There are so many offenses that can be made in devotional services. It is theseoffenses which are our greatest enemy. Devotional service is extremely potent,but offenses can stagnate our spiritual growth very seriously and can everdestroy the devotional creeper. Offenses are activities that try to redirectour consciousness back to previous sinful life or which serve as barriers toour unfoldment. Offenses are like a town courier who delivers an urgent messagedesigned to distract the individual from his or her relevant and importantactivities. When one stops making offenses, one will live with properpreparation and detachment. One will master the science of dying before dyingso as to connect with the soul and its home—the spiritual world. After all,death is to remove everything false and secondary.
So many people have cheated, disappointed, lied, manipulated, and even abusedus. When we reflect on the experience, it is as if we relive it again. Suchexperiences have definitely shaped us in various ways. Many of these abusersand cheaters have traumatized us. In some cases, they have scarred us for life.The normal position is for the hurt or abused to seek revenge and severelypunish the offender. It is easier to do but will not fully resolve the problem.What is important is for forgiveness to be the major means of addressing suchproblems. If one lives with proper preparation and detachment, one will masterthe science of dying before dying so as to connect with the soul and itshome—the spiritual world. After all, death is to remove everything false andsecondary.
Most people have special friends they would like to meet, places they wouldlike to visit, and experiences they would like to have. When we meet, know, orassociate with important people, it makes us more important, at least in theeyes of others. When we can travel to many exciting places, life seems to bemore adventurous. Most important, when we can have many exciting experiences,life seems more meaningful. We are all pleasure seekers and are always eager toexperience pleasure. But the true spiritualist does not get overwhelmed bythese concerns for he understands the temporary and even illusory nature of theworld. If one lives with proper preparation and detachment, one will master thescience of dying before dying so as to connect with the soul and its home—thespiritual world. After all, death is to remove everything false and secondary.
Sometimes we are so busy doing things and even doing things for those we lovethat we don’t have time to be with them, show them, or tell them how much welove them. Sometimes others are so busy doing things and doing things for usthat they also have no time to be with us, show us, or tell us how much theylove us. However, if we truly understand how this life is a preparation fordeath, we will always have time to give and receive love.
When someone dies, much of the sadness usually comes from a lack of sufficientclosure in the relationships. There is something we wanted to tell them or dowith them, and there is something they wanted to tell us or do with us. Eachparty has a tendency to procrastinate on or minimize the importantopportunities and moments. Especially when a person lives solely for eating,sleeping, mating and defending, or when he or she is captured by a very strongfalse ego, there is a tendency to miss opportunities to be fully present. Theperson misses the chance to say or do what will best honor other people’shighest needs as well as blocks the chance for others to honor his or herneeds.
Quality association is most important. Where there is quality association, oneis always either learning something or teaching something. Such association isbased on being with those who also are determined to end the cycle of birth,disease, old age, and death. With quality association, one understands thatjust as there is life, there is death. So one acts with the knowledge that lifeis for self-realization, and that death, which is inevitable for matter and thematerial body, is not associated with the soul. We must die to live! That comesas we accept the inevitability of destruction and elimination of all matter. Wecan then honor the deaths that have happened and those that are manifesting,knowing that they can prepare the way for eternal life.
The true spiritualist profoundly appreciates my mother’s statement, “Give me myflowers while I can see them.” For once the body is gone, the soul departs forits new encounter; therefore, it is important to say and do whatever is bestfor all now! Where we have made offenses, we must stop them and ask forforgiveness now! While we have people to meet, places to visit, and experiencesto have, we must put first things first, understanding the differences betweenwhat is temporary and what is eternal now! We must allow every day of our livesto represent healthy closure now! When we live for love, this is most naturalbecause all of our associations will be quality associations in which we shareour compassion, determination, and realizations, and receive the same fromothers.
This is the technology of how to celebrate life now and live with properpreparation and detachment, so that one will master the science of dying beforedying so as to connect with the soul and its home—the spiritual world. Afterall, death is to remove everything false and secondary.
I am that lowly beggar who is desperately trying to die before dying.

With Love.
Prema.